It is hard to put into words the experience of returning to this place long thought of and daily missed. I feel those feelings today as I opened up and actually dusted off this blog to write a little something. Its like finding a long lost journal where you hesitate to just start writing, picking up the story on the next page after skipping over hundreds of other days. So much has transpired, but there is no way to capture it all in the meantime. So I'm just going to start writing as if I have been here on a frequent basis and as if there is someone on the other side of this screen who is reading. Thank you for understanding.
I love to welcome in new years. There is something energizing about fresh starts, blank slates, loads of hope and possibility topped with a dollop of optimism. Anything is possible and this year, I want to live fully. No regrets. I'm not talking about crazy risks, but living fully alive in moments. Not letting life pass me by, wishing things were different or that I felt differently or that I had the energy to join in the fun. This year for me is going to be all about pressing into challenges, enjoying the simple, taking risks- embracing the beautiful messy journey.
This past year has felt full and hectic and busy and fun. But I do not feel I lived this past year as my best self. I was lax about paying attention to eating well, sleeping well and just taking good care of myself. I felt tired most of the time, lacking energy to put toward relationships, adventures and fun. I feel like I just got by.
Life is still challenging and I feel my days often blur one into another with their sameness and routine, but lately, I've been given glimpses in my heart about how precious these days with my little ones are. My oldest is in kindergarten now and seems so big and my youngest is about to have a HUGE year of changes- big boy beds, potty training, preschool...all the exciting "big kid" stuff.
Our pace feels frantic and slow at the same time, but I'm gradually able to see small, bright future pockets of time that can be carved out for me. Time to write. Time to create. Time to nest. Time to pursue friendships again. Time to read. Time to mother with intention. Time to pursue my calling. That time is not quite here yet, but it is coming...and I want it to both hurry up and slow down all at once because when it arrives, that means that both of my dear little ones will be in school and that reality just does not seem possible. I'm SO ready, but I'm also SO NOT ready as that will mean that my days of mothering babies and toddlers will be truly behind me......Then what? That is what I believe this next year's journey is going to be about for me. Discovering who I am all over again- only in a completely different season of life.
My word for this next year is Journey. I believe that in 2017, I will be journeying toward my future self. In addition to practicing good overall self care in the realm of physical health and overall wellness, I'm also going to practice being gentle with myself as I dust off my writing muscles. It has been ages, since I sat down on a consistent basis to write anything but I know in my knower that it is what I'm made to be doing. So bear with me as I struggle to find my voice and what I might have to share here. I want to develop the discipline of discovery and trying and slowing and savoring. It will be exciting to see where this will all lead me in the coming weeks and months.
All of this being said, I'm going to be intentionally quiet on this blog for the next few months as I set about dreaming and re-creating my blog into what I long for it to be. A place of inspiration, hope and where real life intersects with my dreams.
I'm excited to be coming back to my little corner of the blog world later this spring.
I'm excited to be coming back to my little corner of the blog world later this spring.
