Friday, July 6, 2012

pride, humility, our house and my ebeneezer -part 4



Winter came and went with its weeks rolling into months.  Spring arrived and we were back on the market at the beginning of April 2012.  My spirits were high, and my hopes even higher.  I was more ready than ever for people to come and see our place and to get moving into our new home- wherever that might be.  I felt confident that perhaps now was the right time- springtime in the Midwest is beautiful and typically the best time to buy and sell homes.  Like I said, I was ready, only this time, I was reluctant to ask God if HE was ready for us to move.  I prayed, but to be honest, they were half-hearted and guarded prayers when it came to the subject of selling our house.

I increasingly found myself surrounded by well meaning friends who each had a story of someone they knew selling their home within days of it being on the market.  In a secret part of my heart, I so desperately wanted to have that kind of story to tell- a God story.  A miracle story of how everything just fell into place and worked out, or a bidding war transpiring, or somehow in this dismal housing market, we managed to make money on our house.  I wanted to be able to speak of our experience to others with a wisdom of experience, easily sharing kind compliments given our home by all of the potential buyers who raced in upon noticing it was for sale.  I wanted to just not have to worry.  I wanted to have the confidence that God was in this with us... Aside from some kind compliments from former potential buyers, I have experienced none of the above.
 
There is no question in my heart that God has been using this experience of trying to sell our home teach me humility.  It is now nearing the middle of July, and while we have had lots of traffic in, no one has fallen in love with our little place.  All of the feedback has been positive about the house itself and its appearance, but there is always just one little thing (basement, school nearby etc) that brings people to their decision to continue looking elsewhere.  And every time that feedback has come in, it has broken my heart a little bit and in a small way, my spirit too.  Trying to keep a house semi-picked up, ready for a possible showing at a moment's notice with a one year old naturally bent on mess-making in the house is exhausting...both physically and emotionally. 


Waiting for a phone call that someone wants to see our house and trying to keep the place semi-ready has slowly become my day's work-  and each day that passes without movement toward our goal of moving causes me to feel more and more discouraged, purposeless and frustrated.... 

...to be continued....


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